Depression and its Many Fouls


I strongly believe that chronic depression is one of the toughest things someone can go through. With many physical illnesses a persons mind and soul are preserved… But depression is relentless in eroding fortifications of the mind. Bombing intentions and throwing spears into the heart of joy. Malevolent and fickle it will take anything its filthy hands can grab and use it to cause your psyche harm.

Few people have the necessary tools to cope, and those who do often don’t share. Be it shame or simple negligence, the words are lacking and many who need help do not receive any of use. Our health care systems do inadequate jobs, pushing pills and (un)intentionally drawing up stigma and shame. Our caretakers are often inexperienced and don’t know what is best which makes it immensely difficult for struggling people to progress.

I have lived with depression my whole life and I still barely know how to keep it under wraps. Though I do have a few ideas on how to keep in the best of health possible:

     /1/ Nothing will get better if I don’t do something I enjoy. I am extremely passionate about creating so if I am in a dreary state of mind I need to allow myself time to spew my process of thought. If I don’t I will be stuck and progress won’t be made. If you don’t believe you are a creative person you just haven’t found what your niche is yet. Everyone is creative and thrives in certain productive slots, absolutely everyone is so don’t deny it. Embrace it and allow change for the better (even if its only temporary). If I am unable to let my mind flow I become clogged and bitter. It will set me back even farther and cloud current issues. Find what you love to do and embrace it.

     /2/ Caring (excluding investments into social relationships, which are extremely important) often leads to a lesser mood. For the most I stay away from emotionally investing myself. Disappointment and dissatisfaction easily spawn sadness and I really am not able to carry that load. Immersing myself in constant stress and devotion would absolutely ravage my good moods. Ripping up anything good and creating piles of useless garbage. I will end up surrounding myself in this shroud of inability which often comes off as harsh and cynical but it is one of the ways I cope. People say I am destroying my future and potential but in reality I would have neither if I didn’t carry myself in this fashion. Deterring commitment greatly reduces any amount of stress that I am burdened with… also pomegranates and orange juice, those two works absolute miracles.

     /3/ Giving way to dark thoughts is one of the worst things I can do. If medial ideas begin working their way into my mind I know that I need to take a step back and relax. Deep breathe and put on some raw and exciting music. I have music playing almost constantly as it seems to be a simple way to subconsciously introduce  slight mood changes. If I put on a happy upbeat song my head will seem to pulse in accordance with the beat of the music. It allows me to absorb the mood and mindset of the musician and escape from the grasp of my melancholy mind.

     /4/ If there is nothing that I can do to alleviate my miserable mood I will leave my body to allow for greater realizations. I shall walk out side and lie down on the grass, feel the tendrils of cold crawl up into my body and the acute blades of grass brush up against my bare, insecure skin. Let this world really take affect and reassure me of meaning. My grand intentions and minor social schemes will all fade away as I bask in the vastness of our existence. It generally lifts my mood and allows for recovery, but if it doesn’t help I take a nap and hope something has changed by the time I will wake up.

Those are what most impact my mood, and hopefully someone will get use of this as they truly can make a difference. Mental illness is a huge issue and awareness needs to be spread, we have made huge strides in past years but we are still far away from the idea of universal acceptance. Good luck to anyone that needs it, I am here to talk if you want.

Enjoy what can be, yours truly



5 thoughts on “Depression and its Many Fouls

  1. Bravo, Noah. I am old enough to be your grandmother but have also suffered from depression (and anxiety) all of my life. I am so impressed by your insight into depression and especially by your suggestions of what one can and cannot do to help oneself. Your ideas are excellent and from my experience, I agree with all of them, but I can’t honestly say I have tried them all. Now I will make a more concerted effort to do so. Thank you, Noah.

    PS Don’t stop writing…you have a gift!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh well I’m really glad that you could relate. It really is a huge issue and while a lot of progress has been made recently there is still a long way to go. Thanks for the compliments as well, it really goes a long way😊


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